Connections that we form with people and the world around us have a huge impact on us as individuals. Over our lifespan we see many of our social connections (friends and family) come and go. It’s inevitable that relationships change over the years, but we will always have that time, those memories, and a foundation of connections that we can return to in our minds and emotions.

Revisit memories

I’ve been converting old family photos and slides to digital format recently. Then I’m curating them to preserve our family stories. 

Just making connections with memories in photographs again takes me back to a place where I can relive the feelings/emotions from those days. It’s not exactly the same feeling as the being there in real time but it can be a close second – if you allow it to be. 

Just as visualization exercises can mimic the experience enough to have an impact on our brains and emotions, so too can connections with memories.

That’s why it is so important to practise living in the moment – both during real time events and when recalling memories.

Sensory memory triggers

Sensory experiences with links to my past stories like smells or sounds (i.e. music or the sound of someone’s voice) elicit a nearly involuntary response. Flashbacks are triggered in a vivid way. 

But photos I find require a little more intentionality. I suspect it has something to do with perspective. First, they are two dimensional. Second, they often are taken from someone else’s perspective. Especially if we appear in the photos ourself.

Allowing the time and headspace to “re-live” the event can elicit the same emotions of the experience itself.

This photo of my siblings and I takes me right back to one of our cross country adventures. We were moving for a posting with the Royal Canadian Mounted Police force from the North West Territories to Nova Scotia. We drove south to Vancouver and then East. The trek took weeks with countless stops along the way, visiting family and friends that we hadn’t seen in years. It was a time when we were each other’s playmates and closest friends. This photo reminds me of the move, but more importantly of the connection I felt with my family and the places and people we visited along the way.

Do you have any photos or other mementos that you could intentionally relive the emotions of the past through?

#authenticconnections #familystories #memorykeeping # phototherapy

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Do you know how it feels to be disconnected from everything around you… while continuing to go through the motions? Have you found yourself without authentic connections? Have you ever found yourself surrounded by people, while feeling completely alone? 

Depression & Anxiety

Many call this a symptom of depression and/or anxiety… along with: feeling blue; irritability; lack of interest in things we normally are interested in; fatigue; agitation; sleeplessness; trouble concentrating; etc. 

Studies have identified loneliness and lost connections with others as a cause, not a symptom [of depression or anxiety]. This will come as no surprise to most of us who have lived with challenges of mental/emotional health. 

Loneliness

Humans need social connections to thrive. We know that the downward trend of our authentic connections with others has been happening while there have also been increased rates of depression and anxiety. There is often a direct link. Loneliness = poorer emotional and physical health. So what is the antidote? More authentic connections (relationships) in our lives. But how do we make this happen when we feel so disconnected?

Relationships with friends & family

When my children were young we had just moved for my [then] husband’s work with the military. We had a roller coaster relationship. We moved to an entirely new community and province. And then he was deployed.

I felt alone and struggled with the blues but I knew that I needed friends around me. While the girls’ dad was deployed just months after we moved, I immersed myself in our community – the military family resource centre became our second home. We made friends and helped one another through difficult times.

My parents were hugely supportive and I counted on them to talk about the important things – and the small day-to-day things – when contact with our deployed soldiers was so limited.

I joined mom & tot groups, attended art classes, went to special events, and I volunteered.

It was thanks to those friends, and my parents, that I no longer felt so lonely and that depression was not long lasting.

Authentic connections

Now I know that’s over simplification. But it many ways it is just that simple. Spend time connecting with friends and family and we will naturally reap the benefits of authentic connections. 

Making new friends and having a close supportive relationship with family doesn’t just happen. It takes effort and intentional living. But it is one of the most effective and easiest solutions to loneliness, and the negative effects of it in our lives. 

When is the last time you reached out to a friend?

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Drop me a note in the comments below, or connect with me on Twitter @ceilidhontherun, email me at trish at trishblogs dot com, or use my contact form.

I invite you to follow me using one of the options available on my page (email, rss, Google Connect, like my page on Facebook, etc.)

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