Reflections on motherhood

Yesterday’s workshop at Chester Art Centre with Kate Inglis gave me lots of food for thought regarding self-portraiture as a means of meditating on particular emotions, and on photography & storytelling.

Here I am trying to capture my reflection on motherhood and what it means to me. I think I started getting the process of making a self-portrait, but am still really working on how to get to the depth of emotions.

Self-portrait

 

Raggedy Ann has been with me since birth, or at the very least my first few days of life. Looking at her stitched up neckline, her ratty clothing and her floppy arms reminds me of how much love my mother shared with me. Her expressions of love in the little things (and big things) she did for us, including rescuing my raggedy doll from a heartless purge attempt by someone after a move. 😉

Raggedy Ann

 

I have a small collection of things that remind me of mom & Nanny that I keep handy for when I need their comforting maternal love. Placed on a shelf next to my reading chair. Sometimes I need only glance in that direction, while others I cling to that little bear trying to breathe in the essence of those two amazing women.

Mothers breathe life into their children, mold them and guide them, nurturing their very being. Only mothers seem able to see right into the soul and really know who their children are. There is an ability from early on to distinguish bits of personality that may be nurtured but never stamped out. Through a mother’s love children become people in the wholest sense of the word.

Soul of a Child

 

 

A Princess story

My children have always loved for me to make up stories to tell them at bedtime. I’m always so tired at the end of the day that I’m not feeling very creative. I usual just regurgitate recent events and something that I want them to do. For instance: Once upon their were two little Princesses. Today the Princesses went shopping with their Queen Mommy. They bought groceries and helped put them away. They have a busy week before Christmas and so tonight they are going to close their eyes and go straight to sleep so that they have all the rest they need for the festivities!

Here’s my latest post, a little twist on my storytelling to them, which they haven’t heard yet:

Once upon a time, there were two little Princesses. They lived in a little white duplex in the suburbs with their Queen Mommy and their King Bonus Dad.

Queen Mommy wanted nothing more for her two Princesses than for them to live a happy life knowing that they can, and should, be all that they wish…

Queen Mommy always wanted to be a writer, but instead took the “safe” route, studying closer to home and working toward a more secure, stable, and employable career. She became a preschool teacher. She could always get a job, but often struggled to earn very much. Then she became a mom. The most rewarding, and demanding, and sometimes unappreciated of her career-choices. Eventually she became a social worker. She loves her new career, but still yearns to write for a living.

Queen Mommy recently started blogging to get back in the practice of writing, so that she can one day write something very creative. She blogged about many different things. Sometimes she wrote about her life with her Princesses and their King Bonus Dad.

Queen Mommy wanted her Princesses to know that they had the entire world at their fingertips. And if they really want to, that they can change the world. That they could choose to be anyone, do anything, and live anywhere. That they could envision a world like nothing they’d ever seen, and make their world become more like they wish.

She encouraged them to try many activities, to read everyday, and to enjoy learning. They could be dancers, writers, dentists, photographers, housekeepers, painters, cyclists, runners, sketch artists, mathematicians… Friends, sisters, mothers, daughters, spouses… They could live in rural Nova Scotia, an urban city in Europe, settle down, move frequently, travel often, or enjoy quiet solitude…

Their family spent much of their free time being active together, going for walks and bike rides, and seeing new sites… One year Queen Mommy and King Bonus Dad took the Princesses to many different museums. They loved learning about and seeing so many new things. They often read books together and talked about what happened in the books. When they wanted to know something new they researched together in books and online and shared what they found out.

Queen Mommy often reminded her Princesses that nobody is perfect (not even Queen Mommy). We all make mistakes and if we learn from them then they were worth making.

And so her Princesses will one day be all that they wish to be (and more). All they have to do is try!

Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but by how we react to what happens, not by what life brings to us, but by the attitude we bring to life. A positive attitude causes a chain reaction of positive thoughts, events, and outcomes. It is a catalyst, a spark that creates extraordinary results.”
Anon.